thaís, 26, brazil. I love writing fanfiction and making fanmixes for whatever story I'm into at the moment. let's chat and exchange ideas about revolutionary gay women!
This is much more than a game: it’s a dangerous rite of passage fit only for the best representatives of our species; it’s the lost link between the animality of a wolf and the civility of a human; it’s the most refined embodiment of Pack Spirit ™ since Romulus and Remus were born; all wrapped up in a mass-advertised sport with a damn stupid name. A symptom of my social ruin, the trigger to my personal extinction, the nightmare haunting my failed youth: beware of Disc Wolf.
Here is the fourth chapter to my Enid-centric/Wenclair fanfic I Was a Teenage Werewolf inspired by the movies Ginger Snaps and Raw. Hope you like it!
“Your idea of a girls’ night out is…” the words die down once Wednesday comes back into range. Some nameless emotion has contorted her features into a state akin to… interest? And she’s staring at me, really staring, like there’s something in my body that she wants to grab with her hands and twist under her gaze and… no, it can’t be. Wednesday is just emotional to smell her beloved fumes of death – now ingrained in my very skin, by the way. Nothing more! Still, my cheeks redden to the color of a tomato. I turn to the side, pretending to observe a tree in the distance. Suddenly, it’s impossible to ignore how tightly the drenched panties cling to me.
Here is the third chapter to my Enid-centric/Wenclair fanfic I Was a Teenage Werewolf inspired by the movies Ginger Snaps and Raw. Hope you like it!
Where am I going? It doesn’t matter. The cold wind of midnight punishes my muscles with its force, giving me a substitute for the beating I deserve. I wish it would whip harder… but would that bring me real pain? Wouldn’t the ache turn into pleasure? Fuck, what a messed up body! What a damaged world, if werewolves are allowed to exist!
Here is the second chapter to my Enid-centric/Wenclair fanfic I Was a Teenage Werewolf inspired by the movies Ginger Snaps and Raw. Hope you like it!
Let me shamelessly promote my new Wenclair fanfic! It was inspired by Ginger Snaps and also the French cannibal movie Raw. This is a dark comedy/body horrow fanfic with an explicit rating, so expect kinky (and bloody) smut alongside some delicious gore. Here goes my rendition of the transformations Enid might go through after wolfing out – with lots of Wenclair sprinkled on top, of course!
I’m really starting to disagree with the reaction I see around Mikasa’s indecisiveness.
At first I got it and I still get it a little bit - the phrasing is mostly used as a proxy for Mikasa getting little to do, but I also don’t agree with the interpretations of her character that sometimes come out of those complaints.
Mikasa never was this super proactive Battle Goddess to me. She was always what you call a “reactive character”.
Conflict came to her and she dealt with it, rather than jumping into everything herself.
Since she lost her first one, her purpose in life was to protect her family - people even now reduce it down to her just being protective of Eren, I and many others have always thought it’s more complicated than that, but now I personally think there is even more to it than that.
At this point her not just being protective of Eren actually is also a pretty common perspective around, too.
I think it’s about stuff past that - the specific way she cares and why.
The people around her are the ones who give her meaning and direction and thus she acts depending on how they do.
Where they go, she goes.
Her moment of proactivity in Trost was her way of releasing tension; a reaction to trauma, not her “taking action” and again and again I see this cited as some super cool moment.
She was actually falling apart on the inside and her ultimate resolve was still to go on living for those she loved - in that case, Eren’s memory.
She is someone who unconditionally lives for others and to me the contradictions around the criticism of her character start here.
People want her to grow to be more independent, but because of the nature of her trauma, her journey to independence will inevitabily contain a period of indecisiveness.
That’s just how this kind of trauma works.
Eren is a constant, her friends are a constant. Tearing her away from that safety will naturally lead to indecision and she will have to do work to find another reason to act that doesn’t involve them.
If you are torn away from the people you live for, you are going to be indecisive.
People don’t want the resolution to be that she just cuts herself away from her connections and kills Eren, either because that might come across as her story just being about suffering and going through pain over and over again.
But for her to grow more proactive and “learn to be more decisive” as Armin roughly puts it, she has to go through a separation.
She can’t learn to be more proactive when she is in state of mind where her only purpose for living is living for others.
So it’s a catch 22 situation, where the solution to both is separation, but separation will lead to indecisiveness.
Which is then called meekness and what people usually call “sexist writing” because it involves the female character growing passive, but these are actually two very different things.
Meekness is delibrate passiveness and not even wanting to do anything, indecision is confusion and not knowing what to do.
Mikasa wants to do something, she just doesn’t know what to do.
“What should I do?” she asks.
“What could I have done to prevent this?” she asks.
Naturally, what is meant by meekness is also a lack of retorts. She doesn’t go around disturbing or questioning the chain of command or escalating situations for the worse with her remarks post-timeskip anymore like she did with Rico and Ian during Trost, with Kitz Weilman (the “my speciality is slicing flesh” situation), Levi in the forest (she got his ankle sprained), the “I have no heart to spare” when chasing Eren or even standing against Levi in the serumbowl.
This kind of “meekness” is actually something basically everyone in this story is going through right now, but for some reason people just mostly keep pointing at Mikasa as if she’s the only character that way, but I get it, cold and sharp-tongued Mikasa is probably better written for some because well, maybe it just has more personality for some.
Character development isn’t good when it “takes away” stuff you like the character for in the first place and people like the sharp tongue of the single-minded teenage Mikasa.
I’m really happy this chapter actively made her indecision as part of her character, before I might’ve thought Isayama just didn’t know what to do with her at points - I can definitely see that complaint for the Uprising arc, especially, but now it’s clear her indecisiveness is the point and Mikasa has a new thing going that’s not just about her relationship with Eren. She will have to find a purpose to act and goal to strive towards when everyone she personally cares about is gone and I think we might’ve just seen that purpose when she called out Eren for causing so much harm to others.
She would live so no child would have to suffer like she has and could live a happy life.
This chapter actually made me kind of tear up for her.
I’m not even sure I like Armin calling her out for not being The Independent Woman Who Needs No Man because everyone she cares about is being split apart from her and relationships with other people are everything to her. Taken in a certain way, it could be just read as “stop having feelings”.
Sasha died and she was sitting by her grave, holding her head because of a headache, experiencing the same pain she did all over again as she did with her parents, Eren’s parents, as with Eren back in Trost and Armin in Shiganshina.
But now that everyone she cares about is going their own direction, she is helpless.
So, as said, her arc is about her finding direction again and learning to stand on her own feet and I think she will.
That… or we’ll go the negative character arc route and she’ll go insane from loss and isolation, which I don’t think feels like the direction the story is going.
Oh, but Levi is like her and he doesn’t have such an extreme reaction!
Well yeah, but Levi’s principles are different and his arc is different.
I’d even argue that Levi doesn’t even have an arc - we just learn how his principles developed, which is prioritizing survival at all cost (which he learned to do in the underground city) and don’t regret your decisions (which according to No Regrets is from Erwin). Maybe he softened up a little bit, but even then we saw he already had a “soft side” the moment he was introduced.
Levi could’ve developed a unhealthy relationship with Erwin given more time, but his childhood was never defined by trauma and living for other people. It was trying to stay alive. The youngest we saw him, he was malnourished and taken in by a serial killer. A different arc.
Here you could argue why Isayama just didn’t make Levi the same character, in which case you could bring up the good old sexism word, but also that he wanted to write each character differently.
Mikasa is the only female or male character that values the relationships she has that much except for, well, at this point, Eren. Whose perspective is deeply ingrained in experiencing loss just like Mikasa’s. He wants to genocide the whole world so his friends could live.
Mikasa’s arc is specifically *about* the trauma of losing someone dear to you and what it can do to a person and why it does that.
Those she loves are Mikasa’s safety blanket and now they’re all basically gone.
Sasha is dead and Historia is isolated from this incident.
Armin is panicked and stuck in his mind between all the possibilities, so he runs off on his own to get something done in his mind - Connie, Annie. It’s all swirling together in his mind, in panic, when Mikasa is looking for support.
Connie ran off on his own because of his own trauma.
Jean is probably the most grounded right now, but stuck with a lunatic extremist and paralysed into indecision himself.
Hange and Levi are also off somewhere else.
This is the first time Mikasa is truly standing on her own and isolated and it made me sad.
I guess you could call me sexist, but I feel like her not knowing what to do in this situation is pretty human and delibrately good writing.
It just makes sense to me and I don’t see this apparent “meek” turn Mikasa’s character has taken, when she has always been a reactive character.
The “no heart to spare” teenager Mikasa is the better character for some because her character gives the illusion of “agency” because of her assertive, sharp dialog, but she’s never been to actively go and do something that doesn’t involve what she cares about.
But it’s kind of hard to do that when the people you actually say these things for either told you they hated you or are preoccupied with their own issues and scatter off on their own.
Who will you go on a suicidal rampage on, use your “speciality to cut flesh” and will “spare no heart for” when you have nobody left to fight for?
Man, writing this made me sad. All Mikasa wants to do is be with those she loves.
You know… I really like how Isayama handled the scarf situation with Mikasa.
Isayama was subtle with the way he had Mikasa remove the scarf. Everyone present in the cell had removed their jackets and because of this most in the fandom (myself included) assumed that Mikasa had removed her scarf because it was too, hot. This was a smooth move on Isayama’s part.
Also, I like how Isayama didn’t have Mikasa throw the scarf one side or have her throw it Eren’s face. Instead, Mikasa gently and neatly folded the scarf and left it on the table. The way she did this was very in- character for Mikasa. She herself is a kind and gentle person so the way she handled the scarf is to an extent a reflection of who she is.
I also liked how Louise asked Mikasa if she’s leaving the scarf behind to which Mikasa replied “I am.” This tells us that Mikasa is a “if you don’t ask then I won’t tell” kind of person. Had Louise not asked Mikasa if she was leaving the scarf behind then Mikasa would have left the room without saying anything. Again, this is very in- character for Mikasa. As we know, Mikasa is a woman of few words and doesn’t have much dialogue so Mikasa neatly folding the scarf and leaving it on the table is definitely something she would do and it suits her character.
Mikasa may be a woman of few words. But she expresses herself through her facial expressions and her behavior. But even these can be subtle. In chapter 118 we can see that Mikasa has been deeply hurt by Eren’s words in chapter 112. This is evident by how dead she looks and by the fact that she says “its because I’m an Ackerman.” By saying this Mikasa is questioning herself and she is questioning what it means to be an Ackerman. Mikasa being hurt and heartbroken is also evident by the fact that not even Armin was able to convince her that Eren was lying to them. Armin whom Mikasa believes in and follows without question and doubt. For the first time Armin is not able to convince Mikasa. In Mikasa’s head it’s like, if Eren is lying then what is the truth and why would he have to keep the truth from her and Armin. Why would Eren say he has always hated her. And until Mikasa gets these answers she wont easily be convince that Eren is lying.
So considering how strained Mikasa and Eren’s relationship is, it’s very beautiful how she still treats the scarf with such care. If she wanted, then Mikasa could have just been like, ugh screw it! And throw the scarf in the trash, but she didn’t because that is not who Mikasa Ackerman is.
The fact that she didn’t throw the scarf in the trash, left it in some random place, or burn it also shows how much respect and care she still has for Eren.
If you know Mikasa’s character, then you know how important the scarf is to her. It symbolizes the warmth Eren gave her, and the kindness he showed her by offering her a home. It represents the beauty in the cruel world and it represents the importance of Eren in Mikasa’s life. Considering these facts, its only natural that Mikasa would treat the scarf with such care.
In my opinion, the scarf not only symbolizes the warmth, kindness and beauty Eren showed Mikasa, but it also acts as a source of strength for Mikasa. My reason for saying this is because of what Mikasa says in chapter 112.
“ I became strong because of you Eren. It was all because of you.”
The scarf and Eren by extension became Mikasa’s pillar of strength. It’s the reason she became strong, it’s the reason she protects Eren, and it’s the reason she keeps fighting. Eren became the source of Mikasa’s strength by wrapping the scarf around her and that’s what Mikasa tries to explain to him in chapter 112. In my opinion, it’s got nothing to do with the Ackerbond.
Everything mentioned in this post is why I think Isayama handled the scarf situation very beautifully. It wasn’t only beautiful but also bittersweet.
Its bittersweet because of the sentimentality behind the scarf, the symbolism, and the importance the scarf holds.
The fact that Mikasa slightly looks back at the scarf before leaving the room is also a bittersweet moment. The warmth, kindness, strength, beauty etc that the scarf symbolizes is being left behind by Mikasa. She had decided to make her own choices and move forward and that in itself is a sad/ bitter yet beautiful moment hence the bittersweet.
Mikasa has left the warmth and beauty behind and is heading out to face the cold and cruel world. However, I have full confidence that during her journey to figure herself out and things related to her lineage/ bloodline, Mikasa will once again discover the beauty in the world, but this time it will be separate from Eren.
I’m really excited for Mikasa’s journey.
My post turned out so long but anyway, thank you for reading!
Title: Stories of Insubordination (AO3) Ship: Bismuth & Pearl (Steven Universe) Rating: T (for now) Summary:
Between a Pearl who belongs to no one and a Bismuth who makes weapons
for rebels, a deep — and subversive — bond can be forged. This is a
collection of snippets following their shared resistance during the
Rebellion.
cosplaycat-criminal-deactivated: can i ask why you like bismuth so much? this isn't a callout or an accusation or anything - i just want to understand your reasoning behind finding bismuth to be one of your faves, if that's ok
I like how loving and protective she is of her friends. I identify with her anger and her feelings of helplessness and that her immediate response to betrayal is to feel worthless and self-loathing–she’s obviously mad about what Rose did, but she never calls her bad or even wrong for doing it; she tells Steven about how much she admired her despite knowing she betrayed her, like she doesn’t forgive her for it but she still respects her and wants to understand. I love her because all her flaws happen because her good points exist at such extremes.
I love what she brings out in the main Crystal Gems team!!! Garnet and Pearl are the selves they normally only show glimpses of (that is to say, both radicalized and self-accepting but also deeply vulnerable oppressed people, and old soldiers of a noble resistance to tyranny) the entire time she’s with them. She makes Amethyst feel better about herself and shows immediate respect for her, and even though Steven doesn’t understand her (and like, I don’t like the way it was written but I think he DID innocently misunderstand her; I would have responded the same way at 14…maybe not the re-bubbling) she recognizes him for what he is: Rose’s attempt to completely understand Earth and do better than she did the first time around.
I love her design…I love how interesting and complex but also deeply, fiercely loving and supportive she is in a well-done ship with Garnet and/or Pearl…I love her Working Class Hero vibe, I love her hair. I love the idea that her gem is a very brittle and low-hardness one, she could have cracked or shattered even more easily than Pearl could have? I love the idea that she went into every battle knowing, expecting that it could be her last, that she was the bravest of Rose’s army but would never call attention to it or take credit for it.
I love that her hands and arms are so big and she could carry Ruby or Sapphire or Pearl and probably even Garnet away from danger in one hand
wrt the bravery/brittle gem thing, I love the idea of Pearl comforting her when she was out of commission with a cracked gem on the battlefield and all they could do was wait on the ground, weapons ready, for Rose to get there, consoling each other with daydreams of freedom
01. a pearl in the ground by st. vincent / 02. when she loved me by sarah mclachlan / 03. bells for her by tori amos / 04. breath by kate bush / 05. mutual core by björk / 06. bedtime story by madonna / 07. angel by massive attack / 08. sour times by portishead / 09. strangelove by bat for lashes / 10. rosa by grimes / 11. look after me by hot chip / 12. under the milky way by metric / 13. family violence by arca
